Lost and found

on Jul 9, 2006

I have been feeling quite lost recently. I have endlessly wondered, how it is that one can lose oneself so easily, so inadvertently? One day you get up, and find that you are simply not there anymore. Where the hell did I go? More importantly, uh, how do I go on about finding myself again? This lost thing? Frankly? It sucks. I want myself back, and I want her NOW.

It doesn't work that way. I am not under the couch, or in the back of my closet. I didn't get accidentally thrown out with the trash, and I am most definitely not suffocating in the vacuum cleaner bag. What's going on then? I think I figured it out. Somehow, somewhere I have stopped being creative. I cant even think of a comeback for one of my husbands remarks. I don't know how it happened but I am fed up with it.

Everybody needs to be creative. Creativity is how you discover yourself, how you decide to deal with life. You don't have to have a job in advertising for this. You don't have to be a painter, or a songwriter. Creativity is everywhere. Its in the way you play with your kids, and in the answers you give your boss. Its in the way you dress, the way you manage your budget, the route you take home, the haircut you get. Your don't have to be weird or funky to be creative. You just have to be yourself. You have to find a way to express yourself. And that is what my blogging attempts. I want it to be some sort of mental exercise for creativity. Who knows? Maybe I'm hiding behind a photo essay. Or a traffic rant. Or a contradiction.